i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
porn star boner night. come get it.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Randomize
