Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
