guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
