So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
