He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
