Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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