What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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