just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize