It's like God shit irony all over that family
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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