We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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