I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
