Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
They took my balls.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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