I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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