Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
