I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
it was like eating out sand paper
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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