she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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