Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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