oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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