worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Randomize
