Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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