is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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