Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize