i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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