i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
