She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
