Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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