Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Randomize
