Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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