No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
