I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
