Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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