Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize