he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize