Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
