STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
