Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I wear drunk well.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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