So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
The adults are the big ones right?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
