I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
