i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
