You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
