Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize