Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
