I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
