i barfeds in our rink
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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