Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
