her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
