I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
