So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I don't deserve a penis
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize