She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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