K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
