Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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