thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
