IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize