this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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