I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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